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Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in tib's LiveJournal:

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Sunday, January 30th, 2005
8:06 pm
i guess i never told you guys: i have a xanga now. i know, i know, i'm a traitor and all that. but you should look into it-- it gives you bunches more options. i love it... come see me somtime at...


i love you guys! bye! -tib

Current Mood: awake
Tuesday, January 25th, 2005
4:59 pm
Denny: and today was better than usual, my class went to taco bell
Tracy: awesome! what class?
Denny: 7th period, Wade
Tracy: we never got to leave class :-(
Denny: needless to say, he was dancing in his room while we were away
Tracy: definitely not fair, i would have been dancing with him
Friday, January 21st, 2005
5:25 pm
today something happened that i never planned on happening again. i definitely hoped it would never happen again--the pit bulls behind the alley from us killed another innocent animal. the first was my own puppy. today they killed the stray black cat that's been in the neighborhood for months. sha-boom always plays with her, and i used to feed her. they ripped her up. she was limp. they dragged her up and down curbs. they were running so fast. it made me sick, and i started screaming and crying. so i ran outside and chased the stupid f***ing animals back toward their yard, but they couldn't get back in. so they kept tossing the cat around. i threw up on the side of the alley. it was so sick. then i ran inside and told my parents, and they came out into the backyard with the phone. my mom clled the police and told them that there were pit bulls with no collars running around the neighborhood and they'd killed 2 animals. they said, listen to this, they'll be out in 2 DAYS. oh great, that will help a lot.
the people acoss the street and down 2 houses were on their porch, and they have really little kids (as in kids that pit bulls could easily kill) and i remembered that the claires, this old couple that have lived diagonal to us for longer than i've been alive, have a cat they keep on their porch. so i hurried over there and bribed the cat with sha-boom's food, then brought her to our house so the pit bulls couldn't kill her if they came back around. (they were still in the alley) so the cat's on my porch and we're just sitting there, but then my mom comes out on the porch and scares the cat away and she runs underneath a car in the street. i'm freaking out because i can hear the pit bulls coming back around and i'm frantically trying to get her to come out from under the car, but she won't move. the pit bulls are running straight towards me and i do an incredibly stupid thing-- i try to scare them. anything to save the poor cat... i forgot that theswe pit bulls are as tall as my hips and could easily take me down... stupid tracy! but thank the lord they're distracted by a dog around the side of one house, so they leave and this gives me the chance to chase the cat over to her porch. my mom and dad are on our porch and i'm across the street on the porch with this cat, trying to make sure it doesn't get killed, and then this mexican kid comes strolling around the corner calling the dogs. they were his dogs, and he's walking casually around to get them. they killed a freakng cat, you idiot! get your sick monsters back in a cage where they belong! sicko. anyway, my dad gives him an earful complete with cuss words and threats, then calls the police again. go papa! so the kid totally has NO control over the dogs, he tries to pull one by the collar but the dog BITES THE GUY'S HAND! oh yeah, what a nice pet! i'm gonna go out and buy my son a PIT BULL! stupid... anyway, i have to hold this cat for at least 10 minutes while these guys try to get the pit bulls back in their yard... and when they're finally gone, i leave the cat and come home. then i cry for half an hour because i had forgotten they klled the other cat that i liked!

needless to say, this evening SUCKED. and i didn't get a callback. go tracy.

Current Mood: pissed off
Saturday, January 8th, 2005
7:51 pm
take your candle, hold it high
I DROVE BY MYSELF FOR THE FIRST TIME TODAY! (it was to the next street over, to get valerie and bring her over to study ecnomics, but hey--it was a drive still!) and i parked a whole 4 feet from her curb, crooked! i need to work on parking, lol...

anyway, the most exciting thing that's happened lately is me learning how to drive and getting my license and getting my car. (well, i've technically had my car for like 2 years, but it doesn't really count unless i can drive it) yesterday, on FRIDAY NIGHT, i spent 2 hours doing homework! is that sad? i think so. economics requires a lot of study time. and, on a more exciting note, academic decathlon regional competition is saturday the 29th! and if we go to state, which i really think we could, it would be the FIRST TIME IN BRYAN ADAMS HISTORY! and pinyan and guinn keep saying we're the best team they've had in forever, and we've all been studying and everything... i really think we can do it! i am SO EXCITED! and my speech is about mary poppins, which is totally awesome for me! (it's actually about how people idolize the wrong people and wanting to be like people is okay if you have the right role models, blah blah)

look! a flying mongoose!

furthermore, i sent my SAT scores to hardin-simmons and the LAST THING i have to do is send my transcript! i am SO excited! and i already have $4000 a year, and tuition is only $18000 which is $7000 less than my sister's school, so my parents are already happy about that and everything, plus i already have those scholarships and if i get accepted into the honors program, for which i totally meet the requirements, then all my honors classes will be free too! whch is TOTALLY GREAT! i am so glad i' doing all these stupid essays and junk, because now my parents won't be freaking out about bills and rent houses and working! they'll just be like "yeah, our daughter's in college... and we still got money..." haha. anyways...

i need to call my dad and see about the sons of hermann hall... tonight we're going to deep ellum to party! ...actually not at all. it's this music thingy and a lot of drunk people will be playing guitar and mandolin and singing country music... and i mean *real* country, not that rascall flats/dixie chicks/lonestar crap.


"I'm gonna soak up the sun,
I'm gonna tell everyone to lighten up...
I'm gonna tell them that I've got no one to blame,
So every time I feel lame I'm looking up-
I'm gonna soak up the sun."

Current Mood: amused
Tuesday, December 21st, 2004
11:10 pm
monday i went with marchele and anthony to white rock lake and we had an aaaaaweome picnic! but it was crazily windy, so we ended up moving to the back of her bronco and sitting there, commenting on people that walked by and making fun of shell's laugh. JINX!

then i went with jesse to see national treasure, and i loved it! simply grand film indeed. i recommend it.

so today, al day i got ready for my chistmas shindig (i haven't seen our house this clean in years! my room is loverly!) and i went to the urlogist at 2, couldn't make myself pee in a cup, was told to drink 3 liters of water a day to prevent kidney stones, and left... then had my party tonight and i think it was a success! anthony helped me avoid unwanted attention from a certain male, and the food was WONDERFUL! yay food!

anyway, now i've washed the dishes and cleaned up the trash everywhere, so i'm going to bed! valerie gets home tomorrow and "winter mix" is in the forecast, meaning sleet... and i hae to go drivingwith my mom to prove i deserve my license. i'll probably get in a wreck. grr.



Current Mood: awake
Monday, December 20th, 2004
10:59 am
a ha! tracy is back! and until exactly 17 seconds ago, i couldn't remember anytihng i did saturday. it was quite, quite frightening. i thought i had amnesia or something! i remembered friday and sunday... but no saturday.

but, alas, i have remembered. saturdya morning my mommy took me over to this awesome place in carrollton called Remember When, it has old movie posters and pictures of movie stars, and everything a die-hard fan could ever dream of. and she let me pick out a poster, i ended up with the italian promo poster for My Fair Lady with a huge audrey hepburn covering most of it. it's awesome! so we bought that... and then we came home... oh yeah! i had a junior bacon cheeseburger, and wihlst i know how disgustingly unhealthy they are, it was sooooo wonderful! (then i ran it off, or tried to.)

uhh... then i worked on my room all day, trying to see my carpet through all my junk, then saturday night White Christmas came on, and i'd never seen it before but EVERYONE always told me i would love it, including val, so i watched it, and now i'm scared because val was always telling me she wanted to watch it with me and i watched it without her! aaaaah! but, hey, she's skiing and that isn't fair so THERE! HA! anyway...

sunday morning kerry and her mom came by and picked me up and we drove to the bustling community of italy, texas... population 2000... one stop light that doesn't even work... everybody hangs out at the dairy queen... and i went to their new church where jeff's the preacher! jenna was so surprised to see me! it was fun. after church we went to the dairy queen and ate (me! eating out on a sunday! i had no choice...), then we went to their house and unpacked boxes and boxes and more boxes, then we came home. and i was home for like an hour, then we went to church at casa view, which was a business meeting on closing the school.

the deacons and the staff and everybody has been studying the budget and how much the school costs, etc. and they decided that since our church is broke we need to shut down the casa view school. but all these parents of kids in the school came to the meeting and were like "my little billy has been in your school since he was 5 and he has learned sooo much... and disd is NOT an option because dallas schools are bad..." blah blah. well anyway, i frowned every time someone put down public school because i have gone to public school since 1st grade and i think i have turned out just fine! i am a strong christian and God is number one in my life, and i have a close circle of friends that don't pressure me into bad decisions, etc. so THERE! private school is NOT neccessary to raise decent kids! grrrr!

but anyway, we voted and they won, as in we are NOT closing the school. i don't know how we're going to pay for it, though. our church is definitely suffering.

so this morning my mom left a list of things i need to do... and cleaning the computer desk took exactly 1 hour and 24 minutes. it was dirty. very dirty.



Current Mood: loved
Friday, December 17th, 2004
11:13 pm
yeah, kind of.
"get off the sidewalk--i'm trying to drive!" -anthony, while playing grand theft auto.

today marcy and i went to half price books and i rifled through all the records, and then we went to chili's and i had their queso! (i really hate chili's, but their queso is heavenly! i think i could live on it. indeed.) then we came home... and i super crazy cleaned my room (it's still not done) and yeah... wow. today was interesting.

and now my dad's at a gay bar. his friend royce is playing, it's a benefit for aids research, and they're pretending to be "life partners." it's quite humorous, actually.

tomorrow marchele and i are planning an outing at the lake, complete with our pets and a picnic! it'll be so exciting! i can't wait! and we're going to put together the picnic ourselves, and we'll have sooo much fun! but anthony can't come. :( sniffle, sniffle.

val left for colorado at like 7 today. i called at 6:30 and she was sitting on the bus, having fun. i'm so jealous, and i know it's terribly wrong of me, but i am sooooo jelaous of her! grrrr on me for being a jerk!

what have i done over this break?
-run a lot. i have to get in shape for wrastlin'.
-applied for a total of 1 scholarship. more will follow.
-gotten my license. woot woot!
-gotten a cell phone!
-finished ALL my christmas shopping.
-bought a blue and neon green raincoat from the thrift store!
-turned down a date.
-discovered that crushes die hard.
-eaten my 2 favorite foods: sesame chicken and chili's queso.
-watched 12 episodes of x-files and 8 of m*a*s*h.
-worn black eyeliner. it's fun!
-rolled my jeans instead of folding them.
-kept bein' cool.

happy holidays!


Current Mood: grateful
Wednesday, December 15th, 2004
9:18 pm
and the days went by with the red bandana blues
Holly: Listen. You know those days when you get the mean reds?
Paul: The mean reds? You mean like the blues?
Holly: No. The blues are when you're getting fat and maybe it's been raining too long -- you're just sad, that's all. But the mean reds are horrible. Suddenly you're afraid and you don't know what you're afraid of. Did you ever get that feeling?
Paul: Sure.
Holly: Well when I get it the only thing that does any good is to jump into a cab and go to Tiffany's! Calms me down right away. The quietness and the proud look of it... nothing bad could happen to you there. If I could find a real-life place that made me feel like Tiffany's, then -- then I'd buy some furniture and give the cat a name!

ah... i was at northpark yesterday (that mall can always cheer me up when i'm down, there's something about it-- i went in angry and came out smiling, without buying anything!) and i went in tiffany's... and i totally know how holly golightly felt. looking at all that lovely jewelry that i'll never be able to buy... it was very comforting, relaxing. i definitely felt safe and protected, warm and happy. ahhhh.

so yeah. the meteor shower monday night was AWESOME! val and i were on my roof and it was freezing cold... but very worth it. they were beautiful. some of them were lost, though, cuz they went different directions! haha... dumb meteors... :) so then yesterday i went and got my license... (YAHOO!)... and ran for awhile... and went to northpark... and i guess that's all i did. went to the library and got some more x-files dvds! awesome!

then today i did a BUNCH of christmas shopping for everyone. it was very enjoyable, just me and marcy. i spent almost a hundred bucks... i have like 20 left... that babysitting money sure doesn't last long! so then this evening was the youth christmas party, and it was fun. jesse asked me to see national treasure friday and i said no... but maybe i'll change my mind. it sure looks like a good movie! and it sure feels good to know that someone wants to take me out... i just wish it wasn't JESSE! grrr... but relationships are so dumb. i'm glad i haven't wasted any of my time on high school love-- it's always drama anyway. so i dropped anton's gift off on his porch, i sure hope no one steals it! i felt all mysterious and wildly romantic (even though i'm not in love with him!) leaving it on his porch, like when he comes outside he'll be like "oh no! anthrax!" or something... i don't know. it made sense to me...

so tomorrow i have to get up at 7 and listen to klty and see if i won the drawing for $1000 cash... boy, would that be a sweet christmas present... then i have my ONE exam, which is giving a speech on mary poppins, from 8:30 to 10:45. then i'm OUT OF SCHOOL! woot woot! then i'm gonna go driving with my mom and finish up my shopping... then work on stuff for my christmas shindig. anton, you coming?

i can't wait to give everyone their presents! i got some AWESOME junk! woob woob!


Current Mood: artistic
Monday, December 13th, 2004
9:20 pm
why does my heart tell me that i am?
"i don't mind spending everyday
out on your corner in the pouring rain,
look for the girl with the broken smile,
ask her if she wants to stay awhile
and she will be loved,
she will be loved..."

today has been so enjoyable! i'm not sure school is supposed to be enjoyable... i guess if it's fun, i'm doing it wrong, but it sure was fun today. the day began with an insane conditioning workout in wrestling. it was hard, but very good for my out-of-shape body. kelsey is very inspiring, she kept saying "i'm gonna get a six pack! i'm gonna get a six pack!" haha. good times.

then i went to first period, which is gym... and since it's a one-semester class, i never have to go back! isn't that awesome? i'm sooo glad to be through with that dumb class! now next semester i have late arrival and i'll be driving, which will be neat. anyway... so on to second period english, where i gained a new respect (to add on top of my existing respect) for mrs. leeman. she is so amazing, and while i don't do very well with her teaching style--i'm more of a mrs. fortner learner--, i love her as a person. she's so inspiring! anyway... on to aca deca, third period, which is always enjoyable. so we talked about speeches for regionals, and mine is about admirable heroes in movies (focusing on mary poppins and eliza doolittle from 'my fair lady'), and blah. then to fourth, computer science, where we took our "final" which was actually making any program we wanted (it had to work, haha) using things we've learned. mine was kinda weird... and fletcher and scott didn't finish theirs, but they were doing a really hard one anyway, so they get effort points. i got all confused, but denny helped me out. shpanks a million, *dennmeister!* mrs. martinez totally ordered us pizza! yum!

then after school i spent an eternity in the registrar's office getting my TEA form so i can get my license this week. so i missed the musical rehearsal (we're doing some numbers for elementary schools) and that made me SO angry, and mrs. ward probably won't let me do them now, which STINKS, blah. then we had our taming of the shrew meeting, and i had to present my "ideas" for props, which consisted of ONE original idea that had to do with a pointer... yeah... i'm not very creative in the "reading-scripts-and-pulling-ideas-out-of-them-with-props" thing.

then i came home... and, um... did nothing really... then i went for a little run because... i don't know. but then victor was playing basketball with himself in his driveway and i stopped to say 'hi' and ended up playing for an hour with him! i learned how to "talk street basketball" and i rarely missed a shot. but then again, he wasn't blocking and i AM perfect... :)

it was very fun. then i came home and saw that the geminid meteor shower is tonight and it's a new/no moon, so they'll look even awesomer, and now val's gowna spend the night (we only have to go to wrestling from 7 to 8 and then we have NO SCHOOL tomorrow) and we're gonna look at the meteors! you know, this particular shower is different from all the others in that the meteors come from a cloud of dust trailing behind an ASTEROID, not a COMET, as usual. weird, huh? it's actually asteroid 3200 Phaethon, if you care. interesting.

over and out!


i think this song is about materialism and worldly happiness! think about it...

"On a dark desert highway,
Cool wind in my hair
Warm smell of colitas,
Rising up through the air
Up ahead in the distance,
I saw a shimmering light
My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim
I had to stop for the night

There she stood in the doorway;
I heard the mission bell
And I was thinking to myself,
’This could be heaven and this could be hell’
Then she lit up a candle
And she showed me the way
There were voices down the corridor,
I thought I heard them say...

Welcome to the hotel california
Such a lovely place,
Such a lovely face
There’s plenty of room at the hotel california
Any time of year,
You can find us here

Her mind is Tiffany-twisted,
She got the Mercedes Benz
She got a lot of pretty, pretty boys,
That she calls friends
How they dance in the courtyard,
Sweet summer sweat
Some dance to remember,
Some dance to forget

So I called up the captain,
’Please bring me my wine,’
He said, ’We haven’t had that spirit here
Since nineteen sixty nine’
And still those voices are calling from far away,
Wake you up in the middle of the night
Just to hear them say...

Welcome to the hotel california
Such a lovely place,
Such a lovely face
We’re livin’ it up at the hotel california.
What a nice surprise,
Bring your alibis

Mirrors on the ceiling,
The pink champagne on ice
And she said
’We are all just prisoners here of our own device’
And in the master’s chambers,
They gathered for the feast
The stab it with their steely knives,
But they just can’t kill the beast

Last thing I remember,
I was running for the door
I had to find the passage back
To the place I was before
’Relax,’ said the night man,
'We are programmed to receive.
And you can checkout any time you like,
But you can never leave..."

Current Mood: content
Wednesday, December 8th, 2004
9:52 pm
shine for me, my bethlehem star
"i believe in bethlehem,
shining stars and making friends,
peace on earth, goodwill to men
in all the world...

i believe in silent nights,
feats of love and guiding light,
i believe it all began
in bethlehem..."

and i do! yay!

my shoulders are crazy insane hurting from wrastlin'. grrr! oh well. i bet it's worth it. suddenly salad and lemonade, REAL lemonade, taste very good together. the 9th period pizza party was wonderful! the newspaper came out today, and i think it was pretty good! there were a couple of printing errors, but all in all it might be the best paper so far. i have 4 things in it! my news story about aca deca is on the front page! and then my kill santa commentary, then my pro-life commentary, then my "5 things to do with duct tape" thing. that's unheard of--4 things in one paper! whow! i guess they needed to fill space. anyway...

this weekend is going to be very, very busy! first friday is school, then parents day out from like 6 to 10... then marchele's... then saturday morning is the go to jesse's house thing... then that evening is holiday in the park till 11... then sunday is church and then taming of the shrew stuff--making a list of props for the monday meeting! but then next week i only have to go to school monday till 2 and then thursday till 11! and then i'm done with half of senior year! woob woob!

tonight at choir practice i frantically ran up to jesse and freaked out and was like "Jesse! OHMYGOSH! There's something wrong with your side mirror! The mirror is all cracked and gone, and there's a cord hanging down from it! I think it's been smashed!" HAHA! and he was laughing, then he was like "Yeah, I've decided to name my accident after you-- I was under the ditz effect." Jerk! Still, it was pretty funny.

I MISS TRAVIS! I was thinking about him today. :(

hmm... the choir program will be good. oh yeah! that's sunday! then the christmas party afterward. joy!


Current Mood: just grand!
Sunday, December 5th, 2004
9:05 pm
(Comment on this)
10:57a ( * ) = you've done
( )= you haven't done
( ? ) = maybe...

( ) been high
( * ) kissed a member of the opposite sex (on the cheek and forehead!)
( ) kissed a member of the same sex
( ) crashed a friend's car
( ) been to Japan
( )ridden in a taxi
( ? ) been in love
( ) been dumped
( ) shoplifted
( ) been fired
( * ) been in a fist fight
( * ) snuck out of my parent's house (oh, i *ran away* often when i was a headstrong youngster... i got as far as three houses down and then got scared and ran back)
( ) ever had a crush on someone of the same sex
( * ) had feelings for someone who didnt have them back (as in RIGHT NOW)
( ) been arrested
( ) made out with a stranger
( * ) stole something from my job
( ) gone on a blind date
( * ) lied to a friend
( * ) had a crush on a teacher
( * ) celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans
( ) been to Europe
( ) skipped school
( ) been married
( ) gotten divorced
( ) seen someone die
( ) been to Africa
( ) Been to Canada
( ) Been to Mexico
( * ) Been on a plane
( ) Thrown up in a bar
( ) Purposely set a part of myself on fire
( ) Eaten Sushi
( * ) Been snowboarding (at flagpole hill! haha)
( ) Met someone in person from the internet
( ) Been moshing at a concert
( )had real feelings for someone you knew only online
( ) taken partially nude/nude photos of yourself
( * ) been in an abusive relationship (my dog counts, right?)
( * ) gone to college (gone to A college!)(haha)
( ) graduated college
( ) done hard drugs
( * ) tried killing yourself (not seriously, i was too scared to go too far)(i'm a wuss!)(but it's a STUPID THING TO DO ANYWAY)
( * ) taken painkillers
( * ) miss someone right now
( * ) been out of state
( ) told your parents you hated them
( * ) faked being drunk (i'm sure i have once or twice! haha)
( ) crowd surfed
( * ) met someone famous (THE DIXIE CHICKS back when they were awesome and actually country)
( * ) lied to get out of trouble
( ? ) lied about your age (probably at one time or another)

goodnight my someone!

8:53 pm
won't you be my snow cone man?
"this is one of my favorites, it's called amanda's song...
and it's about a girl named shirley."

-adam carroll last night. he was simple grand!

this weekend has been mucho stressful, and i'm glad it's over. you know how most people look forward to weekends? yeah, i was totally looking forward to this week instead because it's a break from all these things i have to do. today was church in the morning, then homework, then a meeting at 3, then choir at 4:45, then homework until now! woob woob! and i'm going to bed now because i haven't gotten good sleep in a week or two even though i have a latin test tomorrow and i REALLY should study. c'est la vie.

tomorrow is wrastlin' in the morning, then government, latin, newspaper, and tech! then... adult choir practice for the musical next week... then homework... mmm... i'm tired!

i'm SO excited about Christmas! i've now got $75 and i have babysitting on thursday and friday, making more money for gifts! aiiiiiii! i can't wait to go shopping, yo! anyone wanna come with me?

my exam schedule:

monday- early release for everyone, but a taming of the shrew crew heads meeting
tuesday- NO EXAMS!
wednesday- NO EXAMS!
thursday- aca deca exam, 9-11
friday- possible AP CS exam, but maybe NO EXAMS!

WOOHOOOOEY! oh, the joys of knowing senior year is half over... oh yeah! and our senior event is ICE SKATING! i LOVE ice skating! i'm so excited! awesome! being alive is so neat! :)

thank you, Lord, for making this life so wonderful. continue to teach me and bless me as i try to be a better daughter!


Current Mood: busy
Saturday, December 4th, 2004
11:27 pm
so excited i could BURST!
OHMYGOSH! This has to be one of the awesomest days OF MY LIFE! I think I'll even capitalize everything correctly in this entry! Today was so perfect! It was district Academic Decathlon competition, and Corinne was sick, so we only had 14 going, and we were all pretty down about everything and we all felt like we didn't know enough and we were complete failures... so yeah. We arrive at Skyline at 7:45 (way too early) and start studying while getting breakfast and blah blah. (We all looked snazzy in our BAAD TO THE BONE shirts!)(BAAD stands for Bryan Adams Academic Decathlon)(haha) The essay was first, a question about Teiresias' role in Antigone and Oedipus the King... I totally knocked that test out. Essays are wonderful for me! Then we had a 5 minute break and I ran to the bathroom, the meeting place for the girls. Rini, Cristina, and Thoa were there and we talked about how we did, then tried to remember stuff about Ecnomics and Social Science, the next 2 tests. We returned to our testing rooms and took those 2 (neither of which I feel confident about) and then we took Math and Music, and I stink at math but I felt really confident about music! I loved the music materials and I read them thoroughly. Then it was LUNCHTIME! Our pizzas were waiting on the table and we studied during lunch. Christine and I left to pee and when we returned everyone looked really excited and was frantically waving us over, a TOTAL change from earlier when we were all really discouraged... then Xuan whispered to me that Mary (who is a grader plus our coach) knows our scores and we're in THE TOP THREE! OHMYGOSH! So we all freak out but can't let anyone know that we know! It was torture. Then we take the Literature test, then the Art test, then the written Super Quiz (which, this year, was Astronomy)... then we get out and go to the auditorium for the Super Quiz Relay, when we have to go to the front and answer the questoins from the board. It's not half as embarrassing as I'm making it sound. So 3 students from each category compete and they picked ME as one of the B students, which I argued about because I didn't study much for Super Quiz but they made me anyway, and I ended up getting 2 out of my 5 correct. (which is actually good!) Then Super Quiz Relay was over and we took all our junk to the cars and returned to the auditorium for the AWARDS ASSEMBLY! OHMYGOSH!

Soooo... I ended up getting a BRONZE in Essay, a GOLD in Music, a BRONZE in Literature, a GOLD in overall B student (as in my scores all together were the highest out of all the B students from the 12 schools there! Awesome!), and BRYAN ADAMS GOT SECOND PLACE IN THE DISTRICT! (behind Science and Engineering but ahead of TAG, Hillcrest, Skyline, Sunset, W. T. White, everyone!) Last year we got 6th so it was GREAT! And we were all screaming and laughing and crying! OHMYGOSH! It was splendid! Now the next step is Regionals in January, which only 9 students compete in and I'm probably one of them! Awesome! Then... who knows? State? Probably not, but it never hurts to dream big!

Here's to going to sleep with a big head.


Current Mood: SO bouncy!!!
Wednesday, December 1st, 2004
10:31 pm
back and better than ever?
hey... 'tis the season to be jolly! and i'm real, real sad at the moment. (my new adjective is 'real' instead of 'really'... i say it REAL weird and it sounds REAL not-like-me. i love it.) yeah, things have been going real badly lately, and i can't figure out why. so wrestling is real fun, much more fun than i ever thought it would be, and so i'm enjoying that. it makes me feel like i'm doing sometihng productive, when i'm sore at night. it proves that i'm "getting into shape" or whatever they may call it these days. but yeah, so wrestling's not the problem at all. but i guess it's how wrestling makes me feel. the whole story...

tuesday morning, as usual, he told us to pair off and practice something or the other (double-leg take downs, i believe)(wow, don't i have an extensive wrestling vocabulary?)(ha) and somehow i got paired with deby. so that's fine with me and everything, even though i've never wrestled her before i'm like what the heck? but then after we've started practicing she busts out with, "dude... you're SO not in my weight class."

a meaningless comment. it's a true comment. but it made me feel SO EXTREMELY ugly and fat, i can't even express it. yeah, i replied with "yeah, i know... heh heh heh" but inside i was like OH MY GOSH! YOU ARE SO RIGHT! HOW DID I GET THIS FAT? and i KNOW i'm not really FAT, so you guys don't need to reply telling me not to be anorexic... just hold it. the point i'm trying to make is that i used to be really skinny, and i had self-confidence because that was something about me that i didn't have to work for, and people were always complimenting it. it felt so good to get a compliment and not deserve it! but now i'm just getting bigger and bigger because i don't really care about what i eat anymore... i just eat and eat and eat. and i like it. it feels real good to just sit down and eat what i want to eat, when i want to eat it. but... it's catching up with me. and the sad thing is, i didn't even care until the deby-wrestling incident. i think she's like 105 to 109 or somewhere around there, and i'm currently 115. ONE FIFTEEN! less than a year ago i was 103. what in the heezy is going on? it's going to have to reverse, or i'll have to buy new clothes because mine might actually fit me! GRRR!

anyway... i guess i should get off that. it just annoys me, not that i weigh 115, but that i gained all that weight so quickly, and that people are now calling me "normal" instead of "skinny," which is a terrible thing to complain about I KNOW, I KNOW TIHS IS A STUPID VAIN ENTRY BUT I DON'T CARE AND IF YOU DON'T THINK I SHOULD TALK ABOUT THIS THEN PLEASE DON'T REPLY BECAUSE I DON'T NEED ANYONE INSULTING ME RIGHT NOW!


moving on... yeah. and Christmas is rapidly approaching and i have $20 to my name because i had to raise all this money for Close Up and the deposit i turned in a week or two ago... leaving me with ABSOLUTELY NOTHING. and i have a loOoOoOong list of people i need to shop for (for whom i need to shop) and NO MONEY WITH WHICH TO DO IT! and if the AP money hadn't come in today, i wouldn't even have $20! (i had to use the other 80 to pay for the academic decathlon shirts, long story). speaking of aca deca, competition is saturday and then i'm going to the adam carroll concert! woob woob!

back to the present... yeah. and guys are a whole different story. i guess this goes along with the whole feeling-fat-thing, but i also feel like guys are just TOTALLY not liking me anymore. (that sentence didn't come out right.) i feel extremely unattractive and i know that, while at other times i've known that someone liked me and that, if i wanted to, so-and-so would totally want to date me... right now i know that nobody's interested. (please don't think of this as me being self-centered. i'm just trying to put all my thoughts on here and some of them ARE self-centered.)(grr on that) but yeah. and this is going to be the most jealous sounding thing EVER, but i'm crazy mad jealous of valerie. i know--jealousy is EVIL! AAH! but i really am. everyone's all like "ohmygosh val! your hair looks so cute blonde! the cut is so pretty! i love valerie!" and she had that wonderful, blissful albeit bittersweet love affair thing (hehe) with thomas, and now michael likes her, and i know someone else that likes her, and people keep talking about how hot she is when i'm around... and i'm like AAAAAHH! I'M PRETTY TOO! (lol now that was EXTREMELY self-centered. i think i'm a pro at this jerk thing.) but yeah. valerie is totally driving the bus in this area. go val! boo tracy! :)

furthermore, this weekend i became re-obsessed with THE X-FILES! i bet very few of you were around when i was obsessed with them in 6th through 9th grade, but yeah. i was crazy deep into it. and... now i'm back. but don't worry! i'm more mature this time! hehe. i guess... i guess x-files isn't something you can just shove under a rug for years and forget completely about the magic that lives in it. it's a show that has to be pulled out real often and swallowed whole, to get the full impact of it. ahh. sweet x-files!

anyway. so yeah. some things are wonderful right now... but the problem is me. i need to do something that makes me skinnier and thus makes me feel more like myself and more confident, and i need to stop being jealous of val (oh yeah! AND she gets to go on the freaking lakeside ski trip! how unfair is that?! my parents are freaking out about washington d.c.! and she gets to go to colorado AND new york! AAAAH!)(hey--what's christmas break without val?! what am i going to DO?!), and i need to... become someone else. man, tha'd be nice. then i wouldn't have to answer to all the stupid things i do. oh! and a special shout-out to the wonderful anton, who had his wisdom teeth removed! because i'm such a self-absorbed JERK, i didn't even have any idea he was having them taken out because i'm too busy for my friend any more! but i love anthony and he is extremely awesome and i miss him and we have to spend christmas break at each other's houses even though he'll probably go somewhere awesome with his dad. grr.

okay... must go now. much government to do. PEACE!


Current Mood: anxious
Tuesday, September 21st, 2004
7:45 pm
i'm soooo sorrr, gena and others who might care, for not updating! my, has it been a while!

soooo much has happened since we left off in the adventures of tracy. first... well, we got our musical parts. and, once again, i am a lowly chorus girl. i guess all the people who think i'm a good actress are BIG FAT LIARS! lol.

umm... oh yeah! i got a kidney stone sunday morning at 6:15... excruciating pain... rushed to the hospital, demanded morphine, was happy at last... got a ct scan, which was AWESOME, stayed home from school yesterday and passed the stone at like noon... umm... the newspaper's coming along wonderfully, EVERYONE BUY A COPY...

yeah. oh yeah! more news! the mexican kiddos next door were given the trampoline of this other family that moved from our street (white flight!) and so noe every evening for the past week (it's actually a good record if you think about it) i've spent 45 minutes jumping with them. it's a WONDERFUL workout and i've mastered a single arabian front. (carly patterson did a double arabian front dismount from the beam in athens) so that's fun.

things are OH SO BUSY right now. grrrr on stress! and this stupid kidney stone happened at a not-good time, because it turns out that my coach who assigned me to be a teacher's aid in the special ed class has been counting me absent EVERY DAY since the beginning of school... and mrs. ward comes up to me this morning when i'm already really sore from the IV morphine wearing off and everything and is like "you missed paris original practice yesterday! i'm cutting the people who don't come!" and i was like "AAAAH! i was sooooo in the ER on sunday and i wasn't even at SCHOOL yesterday! keep your pants on!" (no, i'd never actually say that.) but that makes me really sad. because i'm actually a *reliable* chorus person and i rarely miss rehearsal. grrrr.

but yeah. and tomorrow is the blood drive at church and i'm pretty sure i can give... but the bruise from the iv on sunday is on my right arm, so i'm gonna have to have them take blood from my left arm, so i'll have matching bruises! how EXCITING! :)

yeah, and... what else? umm... i got my homecoming dress! i'm going with jonathan and the dress is AWESOME- me and val found it while we were roaming around the mall, it's dark purple and has a big flower on the left side... and it flares up and gets all big when you spin around! fun!

sooooo... yeah. so much has happened! i have so much more to say but my parents aren't here and i have to do the dishes and study for my latin test tomorrow! and mrs. fortner wants me to read beowulf and report to her and possible get european lit credit! that would be SoOoOoOo awesome, because i really wanted to do british lit this year but her only off period was my newspaper period, so that's impossible.

oh yeah! aca deca is loads of fun too!

gotta go! till the butterflys! -tib
Tuesday, August 24th, 2004
9:12 pm
america, america...
"it's been awhile
since i could hold my head up high..."

yeah, i guess it has. poo. guilt trips suck. but yeah... it's all grand now. i'm fonally in a habit, and it's a good habit, of eating healthy foods and "working out" which is actually a sad excuse for athleticism-- just a jog around the neighborhood. but i'm brushing up on some gymnastics stretches (whoa, memories coming back) and should be getting a tad bit slimmer in the future. (PLEASE don't comment and say i don't need to be slimmer, that gets SO old and if i say i need to, then i need to. i'm not stupid. thank you!) also, the blood drive at the church is coming up in september (my mom's *in charge* of it, haha) and you have to be 17 and 110 pounds to give, so maybe i can put on some pounds of muscle or so before then, just to make sure.

musical auditions began today with dancing. (ooh oooh, my strong point! HA!) it wasn't a *hard* dance per se, but me being the clumsy, awkward retard i am, it was mighty difficult. i always forgot the frickin hop skippity things! grrr on me! but oh well. i can't decide whether to sing or not. if i do, it will be a mere "happy birthday" and if i don't, i might be angry with myself. i don't know. i'm too tired and the smell of beer is overwhelming (yeah, there's an empty bottle next to the computer and it smells crazy good)(NO, i'm not a drinker and it tastes nasty... but right now it smells good. is there anything wrong with that?!)

blah blah... classes are challenging this year. i wish i had early release or late arrival or something... aren't seniors supposed to take advantage of those? computer science and stats are the hard ones for me... math is my worst subject and computers hate me. (i'm on my dad's laptop because our desktop is BROKEN- thanks tracy!) government is interesting and english is okay... i've actually never enjoyed an english class LESS than i enjoy leeman's. everybody talked about how she was really cool and stuff... but she seems really dull and not to my learning style taste. and english is my favorite subject... so that's a grevious loss. and i mourn.

umm.... anything interesting happening? i'm getting used to e-mailing my sister kerry, as she is off at baylor now. it really stinks, but i bet she's excited to have the internet now. and i think some of the casa view seniors are gonna go to baylor preview weekend just to see her- we're not even interested in the school! :) this makes me smile.

i'm gonna go to bed. i'm tired and olympic gymnastics just came to a close with the champions gala. SPRINGBOARD DIVING! be still, my heart!


Current Mood: drained
Wednesday, August 18th, 2004
5:30 pm
okay. this is a momentous occasion. today was a very important day. we have officially started a club at bryan adams high school. it's currently "underground" as defined by the dallas independent school district guidelines when it comes to organizations... but if we can find a sponsor (unlikely!) it can become an actual cougar club. adam's the president, fletch is the v. p. and i'm the secretary! it's going to be so fun! we're having an interest meeting and i'm working on signs to advertise it... and i'm also researching campaign pins, stickers, and t-shirts. because in a liberal school like ours, you need all the official gear you can get, to make a dent in people's minds. i think it could be great, though! we need mire clubs like this! so i'm looking forward to the meeting, and seeing who'll come. i think it will be an experience. i'll make flyers too, that should be on my list. ooh prices are high! my dad might chip in a little, though... and i can use some of my summer earnings. it's worth it, after all!

oh yeah... it's the young republicans club. i forgot to mention that!
Sunday, August 15th, 2004
8:36 pm
farewell to bliss
as this summer draws to a close, i can't help but bid farewell to a genuinely happy time in my life. i can't help but feel that something really neat is being sucked away and won't ever return quite the same. gone are the evenings with the kids next door, down the street, and across from me... sitting with them, catching fireflies, "racing" on our bikes, which actually consisted of them riding their little legs off and me slowing down every 5 seconds... gone are the lazy days with my sister, impulsively going shopping and discovering new foods i never knew existed... gone are adventures with valerie, meeting mormon missionaries and making fun of their titles, biking everywhere, sleeping until 9 and feeling sinful, re-reading and re-watching harry potter over and over again, and spending time with kerry. i shan't see her again... until christmas probably. doesn't that SUCK? and this summer... well, something about it was special. like i realize that i'm growing up, and that in a year i'll be off living at college surrounded by strangers... and i realize how much i love home. i've always wanted to escape from dallas because it's confining... and i still do, mind you... but it just feels like, when compared to the confines of college, home is better on so many different levels. i'll be leaving all my friends (except kristen probably... but i don't really like her that much!) and moving away... people will forget me... i will forget people... things will never be the same. ever. and that's such a scary feeling. but it's exciting, though... oh well. i need to stop thinking about this and go to school tomorrow. senior year is supposed to be great, right? we'll take it as it comes. bye, summer!

Current Mood: artistic
Saturday, July 31st, 2004
2:57 pm
tomorrow i head out for pre-teen camp. so i shan't be talking with you guys until my return. :(

"and this i know with all my heart--
His blood has paid my ransom"

sorry, those (^) words were in a song we sang at worldchangers worship, and i really liked them. :) you know, when specific srtings of words just hit you, and you like them for some reason? yeah, those were like that.

today i bought the jason morant cd ('twas on sale for 9.97 at lifeway) and got a FREE INSULATED TUMBLER with mercyme on it! it's so exciting! i really like the word *tumbler*. how bout you? it's blue and really neat. and now, everywhere i go, i'm going to take my INSULATED TUMBLER and people will be like "here comes the girl with the INSULATED TUMBLER!" 'twill be cool.

so this is kinda my "farewell" journal entry... saying goodbye to the computer... hmm. how 21st century, eh?

this is also my 'goodbye anthony' entry. i believe he is leaving for the grand tetons tomorrow, and shan't be back until august 11th or so. that's a long time with no anton, and we shall all observe a moment of silence for his absence.

(be quiet!)

yeah. thanks! so a lot has been happening, and most of it hasn't been good, but we'll just look at the positive right now. we just got a bed for marcy's house this year... she's been living in the dorms but now she and 2 other friends have gotten a house near the school... so she needs furniture. sha-BOOM! seems to be adjusting to her leash FINALLY... my glasses feel like a part of my body already... i made fifty bucks yesterday to add to my growing funds... camp looks promisingly fun... the burn i got on my arm from the evil iron earlier this year is fading slowly but surely... my dad has started ignoring me instead of being a jerk... and i think next year might just be kinda fun.

old people are really cool, when you get to know them. lord, give me the patience to get to know the people you created and to love them like you have.

take it slow yet again!

Saturday, July 24th, 2004
12:10 am
so kiss me hard
i swear i just typed in 'livejournal.com' and it took me to 'dogpile.com'

do ya'll think it was insulting lj? i personally see it as a conspiracy against the american public.

"don't you see, don't you see
the charade is over
and all the best deception
and the clever cover story awards...
they go to you?"

not sure if those words were exactly right... but i think i got the gist of the whole song thing. and it really sucks, i think that's true for me. i put on an act way too often, and it almost feels like it's real.

"he'll be there down every road-
you will never walk alone."

i think i just needed to update. i got new glasses! (those two weren't related)


Current Mood: restless
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